Ode to Paula

How could you leave us, Paula? I know Idol is only giving you ten million a season as opposed to Simon's 100 million a season or whatever, but don't we, your adoring public, mean more to you than that? I will miss your dresses too short for a woman your age, hair too big for a woman your age, comments too drunken for a woman your age, and your sweet, kind remarks to all of the talentless performers at the very beginning of each season. You have more personality than the rest of the judges put together, though. I will miss ya! Who knows??? Maybe Fox will pony up the real dough now that you showed them that you won't settle for that pathetic ten million.